Right, come back here. Stop looking at it. You need to read my review. Now, you cretin.

Back? Good, because Necrocest's _Prenatal Massacre_ is more than just a pretty horrific face. In fact, Necrocest are pretty bloody fandabeedozy. They're basically a full on blood and guts death metal band in the vein of Decapitated and Cannibal Corpse, and god bless them for it. It adds nothing new to the pantheon of elegance that is brutal death metal, but there isn't much more you could add, is there? Having said that, it's a big world, and there's enough room to squidge one more blood, guts and tits obsessed metal band in there.

Opening with the brutally named "Track 1" (the song's original name was evidently 'too' brutal for iTunes), it's... well, it's death metal, isn't it? You all know what death metal sounds like, don't you? Unless you're a stupid dick. Or a member of Bring Me the Horizon. Surely you don't need me to describe it for you? All I'll say is that it's a fairly run of the mill jaunt through the genre, but the mill is strewn with the bones of OAP's and the juicy entrails of Mormons. It's a very metal mill.

The level of playing on the record is pretty impressive. I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting too much, so when I heard riffs and playing that wouldn't sound out of place on a Morbid Angel or Decapitated record, I was pleasantly taken aback. The band know how this stuff works, and the record explodes and pops in all the right places, resulting in a satisfyingly crunchy listen.

The band are tighter than a Scottish nun's vagina (pre-obligatory gory mutilation), and overall it's a bloody, gut encrusted package. It's a little one dimensional, but when you buy an album called _Prenatal Massacre_ it's a good bet artistic fulfillment isn't on the menu.

Also, they're from Cardiff, so I'll give then an extra few points out of sympathy, because they've made an excellent record, even with the crippling disadvantage of being Welsh.

Joke! Boyo.