Lita Ford - _Wicked Wonderland_
(J-LRG Entertainment, 2009)
by: Quentin Kalis (3.5 out of 10)
Older readers may recall Lita Ford, who was last heard from in 1995 with the unimpressive _Black_ album, but back in the '80s she was the undisputed queen of glam metal. Fifteen years is a long time, and Lita Ford has attempted to update her music, creating her heaviest album littered with electronic bursts. Pity that this could not be presented in a more interesting package; the songs are boring and insipid with no memorable hooks -- no riffs, no melodies, no chorus, nothing; only her leads are worth mentioning, and this alone is insufficient to save an album from bargain bin purgatory.

The lyrics are a joke, much of it overtly sexual -- just look to "Crave", which will apparently be the first single: "Whips n Chains / Nice round hips / I show no mercy / But you love the tits". Those juvenile types who may appreciate such lyrics should remember that Ms Ford is now 51, not that it is apparent from the extensive Photoshopping. Despite all the overt sexuality, "shit" is bleeped out on "Patriotic S.O.B.". Huh? "My love dripping off your face" is OK, but not "shit"?

The impression I am left with is that she is trying too hard on all fronts; heavy to show she isn't listening to Mariah Carey on her island home, electronic nonsense to show that she is aware of musical advances during her sabbatical, and near pornographic lyrics to somehow prove that she is still sexy. The whole album has the unmistakable whiff of desperation, and who wants that in their metal?

Contact: http://www.litaxx.tv

(article published 4/1/2010)


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