Cage - _Astrology_
(Omega / Universal, 2000)
by: Kirsty Buchanan (
Despite having a frontman who bears more than a passing resemblance to British Klingon-faced comedian Bill Bailey, appearance cannot save Cage. Opening with a brief (and yet still pretentious) introduction, this record only goes downhill. From there on in there is nothing but a catalogue of excessive, unnecessary guitar "nonsense", squealing American men, frankly slapdash drumming and poorly dreamt up concepts. Each song relating to an individual element of the zodiac!!! I wish I could credit Cage with a good idea, but basically, this effort doesn't work: it's a bad plan to start with and is horrendously executed. Let's play a little game, shall we. What did Dave Garcia (guitar) and Sean Peck (vocals and Klingon warrior) listen to last decade? That's right, nothing but early Judas Priest and late eighties Iron Maiden. The whole thing comes across as convoluted, pretentious and visionless. With no desire to -affect- the public, Cage seem happy merely lining their pockets with Deutschmarks. If only they had some degree of freshness, innovation or a modern context. Though I doubt any of that would help. With lyrics that "a teenager in anguish" would be ashamed of, Cage fail to even interest me -- and their band photo resembles the local pub darts team that your dad and uncle play on. It's merely a matter of time before silly hats, beige cardigans and dominoes become the order of the day. Rubbish. Nothing more.
(article published 1/10/2001)
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